I feel like Im going crazy?

May 16, 2009 by admin · 11 Comments
Filed under: Marriage & Divorce 
construction tools
♥*´`*•. mommy♥*´`*•. asked:

Ok well here is my problem, Im 8 months pregnant and live with my husband in a small apartment that we rent, But he has become so unorganized and messy!!!! he does construction work and has tools and his other stuff like treadmill, and some very old weight machine etc., the thing uis that he has them inside our apartment!!! they are in our living / dinning room, as soon as you walk in my home it looks like a junk yard! I feel like crying every day from seeing this mess! I cant even walk in there thats how bad it is!!! its so dusty and messy, and he refuses to rent a storage room, and Im worried about my baby that is on its way to come to a home like this!!! please help me what should I do??? Things at home get lost all the time because theres so much mess, my dining table is full of his construction books, and papers! Im going crazyyyyyy!!! This is not safe for anyone specially my son!

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11 Responses to “I feel like Im going crazy?”
  1. daphine_h says:
    May 16, 2009 at 11:10 pm

    Tell him what you are telling us about your concerns about the health of your child. Ask him if it would be okay if you put some stuff in storage or toss things not being used. If he says no, tell him that you wil make arrangements because your child is more important than stuff. Follow through. He’ll get the message.

  2. Molly B says:
    May 19, 2009 at 2:13 am

    Clean and dust and organize.

  3. Ty says:
    May 19, 2009 at 11:06 am

    You should mention the idea of purchasing a house to your husband. This could alleviate the issue of space that you are dealing with currently, since he will not consider storage. Let him know that more space is needed, especially for the baby who will be crawling and walking before long. Express that you need space as well and encourage him to sell or give away the unused items if he will not consider a house.

  4. lyttledarlin says:
    May 22, 2009 at 8:07 pm

    Calm down dear its called being pregnant and mothering. I am a mom of 2 and a step mom of 2. I use to go nuts over the mess. I love to come home to a clean house. I finally realized that people do live here and it just aint gonna stay clean. Tell him that you do need his help in keeping the house clean. Tell him you feel unappretiated if you clean the house and he come right behind you and just throws his things where ever. Just talk to him. He will either comply and help. Or you are just gonna get more pissed off. AND right now you need to worry about being pregnant not house cleaning.

  5. Rearose says:
    May 23, 2009 at 3:26 am

    Wow…….Id go crazy too. Why dont u take the liberty of getting some friends, and u renting a storage, or talk to ur husband, ask him if he wants the baby in this world, coming to ur apartment, and dust flying in the air. Not good. Ask him, do u want a good life for our chiild or not. If yes, do something about this mess! Tell him UR goign crazy. DOnt let him take months to figure that out. Its useless.

  6. calgirljlo says:
    May 23, 2009 at 11:32 pm

    And when your son starts crawling and climbing up it will be even worse. You are probably getting ready to go through the nesting thing and you don’t even know where to start cause it is such a mess. Tell him if he doesn’t have all that stuff gone by the time the baby is here, you are not gonna bring the baby home there. You will go to your moms or your friends, anywhere but there. That is all you can do really. You can’t lift stuff that heavy and not only that, where would you put it.

  7. Babie Gal says:
    May 24, 2009 at 6:12 am

    this is your house too, you can clean and organise it just as you want it and he can do nothing about it. Go on and organise your house and by the way a clean house says alot about you so its up to you to do the right thing.

  8. Just a guy says:
    May 25, 2009 at 9:48 am

    Ok you need to get him to understand that you are begging to go through a period known as nesting. I am sure a lot of the clutter has been there all along but now it really starting to worry you right. Ok he is going to have to understand how stressed out this will cause you. he needs to read the chapter in what to expect on the 8 and 9 months of pregnancy. If not i would call a brother or dad or any guy friend or macho girlfriend you got and get them to help you move and oganize these things so that you dont hurt yourself. Try to talk calmly with him everyone that i knew went through this to some degree and bravo for wanting a clean area for your child. Just try and stay calm when expressing our views and may be cry a little we always fall for that

  9. nrocco1 says:
    May 25, 2009 at 9:10 pm

    Hello honey,
    I have to say you are going crazy… but there’s a reason for that! First of all, you have the hormones that are flying around your body! thats normal but theres nothing you can do about that.
    Your going crazy for other reasons as well. You, my dear, need help. You are part of a team that includes your husband, the child and yourself.
    Todays world id very tough and I would get your team together as fasts possible so you can get through this life together. Strenght in numbers!
    You can do it alone, butit will be extremely tough.
    You need the entire team on the same page!
    Good luck,
    nrocco

  10. Luscious Lips-Survivor says:
    May 26, 2009 at 3:44 am

    Hormones sweetie…Look at your question… your man loves you works to bring home the bacon, talk to him and tell him to help you organize. things will work out. best wishes with baby

  11. Michael K says:
    May 29, 2009 at 8:58 am

    I have the same problems as he does. I am a construction worker also, and attending college to become a construction manager. I am seldom at home to do ANY cleaning, except for the weekends. I feel your pain. My ex-wife FELT the same pain that you do also. This was one of her MAJOR GRIPES. My garage was packed fuul of construction equipment and tools. Our basement was also packed full of junk. Eventually this problem led to our divorce. That was 7 years ago. Since then I have built a second garage and put my junk in there. I also have garage sales once or twice a year to get rid of unused stuff. I also rent a 10×20 foot storage shed which costs me $60. a month, but well worth it. I read a book about this problem also and learned that I am what is called a “Hoarder”…yes…guilty as charged. I like to “hoard” things because this is how my parents taught me to be. Nothing is garbage. EVERYTHINGGGG gets recycled or used. I also bought a book about packrats like me and learned how to change my ways of thinking, and slowly resolve these problems. It’s working. My home is slowly becoming more organized and “de-cluttered”. I thought that getting rid of the junk would cause anxiety for me, and it DID. Fortunately that anxeity was overcome by the good feeling I had about seeing the house more clean and organized. You need to take “baby-steps” in order to move towards resolving the problems. Get the storage shed for starters and DO NOT collect more stuff to fill the voids. There are several good books in the bookstores to give you useful information. Good Luck

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